difficult time

Posted on January 25, 2012 by thelouise

I am having a difficult time. It’s just weird. I’m like empty. I get scared some times… will I have feelings again? Will joy return? I read the Psalms and I cry.

I ONLY want God’s will in my life. I only want what God wants. Nothing more. Nothing less. It seems I’m filling my time. Waiting. Why can’t what God wants me to be… be born? I don’t even know what it is! I ask all the time!

Listening to  James Taylor… yeah… always thought I’d see you again… fire and rain… martha’s vineyard… yeah

God have mercy of me.  It’s all good.

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Fine. Are you there?

Posted on January 23, 2012 by thelouise

I want to go to your 1/30 game at home. How shall I be invited?

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Psalm 13

Posted on January 23, 2012 by thelouise

O LORD, how long will you forget me? Forever? How long will you look the other way? How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day? How long will my enemy have the upper hand? Turn and answer me, O LORD my God! Restore the sparkle to my eyes, or I will die. Don’t let my enemies gloat, saying, “We have defeated him!” Don’t let them rejoice at my downfall. But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me. I will sing to the LORD because he is good to me.

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Quote by Thomas a Kempis

Posted on January 18, 2012 by thelouise

When Christ was in the world, He was despised by men; in the hour of need He was forsaken by acquaintances and left by friends to the depths of scorn. He was willing to suffer and to be despised; do you dare to complain of anything? He had enemies and defamers; do you want everyone to be your friend, your benefactor? How can your patience be rewarded if no adversity test it? How can you be a friend of Christ if you are not willing to suffer any hardship? Suffer with Christ and for Christ if you wish to reign with Him.

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Jeremiah 1:19

Posted on January 17, 2012 by thelouise

They shall fight against you; but they shall not prevail against you: for I am with you, says the LORD, to deliver you.

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idk. idk. idk!

Posted on January 16, 2012 by thelouise

How many times have I started a post like that? In the last 2 years? Too many! OMGosh! God, my heavenly Father! Can’t I get some resolution? Why can’t I get resolution? What am I doing wrong? Honestly! I can’t handle it any more. I really need to know which way to go. I can handle it if I knew WHICH WAY TO GO! Really! Everything is so wishy-washy!  My logical side says “yep, it’s time to stop” but there’s another side that says “but….” and it questions the logical side with very good questions. These questions make me doubt my logical side! It’s a nightmare!

I am always thankful. Even now. Please. What am I suppose to learn from this? I can’t get it. I’m hoping if I learn this lesson I can break the cycle but I am just not getting it! Please pray for me!

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Psalms 19:13

Posted on January 15, 2012 by thelouise

Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me. Then I shall be blameless, and I shall be innocent of great transgression.

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Friday

Posted on January 13, 2012 by thelouise

Not sure what is going on. As per usual. I decided to take action which is good on my side but not if the other person doesn’t acknowledge it! So here I am!

Everything is well. Things are starting to move and that’s why I decided to take action! Class is awesome! Looking forward to doing this! My interview went awesome! Really hit it off with the person doing the interview and she liked me! Very good outlook even if I don’t get this job.  She is keeping my resume and application on file because they will need someone else in the future! God’s will be done.

I had a dream last night that I was in a marathon and I was at the finish line. I finished the marathon! I was so happy but I was also really strong! I felt like I could do it again! I wasn’t tired at all! I did another “lap” because I felt so good! This is a good dream! I made it through this marathon and I have finished the race! I ended the race strong, happy, refreshed! Only one lap to go! So be it!

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Quote by Benjamin Franklin

Posted on January 12, 2012 by thelouise

Many a man thinks he is buying pleasure, when he is really selling himself to it.

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Revelation 3:8

Posted on January 11, 2012 by thelouise

I know your works. See, I have set before you an open door, and no one can shut it; for you have a little strength, have kept My word, and have not denied My name.

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